My Point of View

I sit here in the office with loads of work to finish off tonight. Most of those I know have already gone back home for Diwali. I got my parents and wife waiting for me at home but I'm not going. I don't actually feel like going home right now. I want to spend time with them but cannot. There seems to be some component of my life that's missing. I miss my loneliness actually. I really want to be completely lonely. My mind is pulling me back to my past but I'm not interested. My family wants me to look forward, but again.. not interested. I want to feel this moment. I want to feel again what it's like being all alone in this social jungle with no one to bother me not even my mind.I guess loneliness is addictive like cigrettees. There is so much to loneliness to enjoy. The feel that time has stopped for you and you get to enjoy this very moment over and over again. Anyway, let me just finish off my work and go back home.. let the time roll...

I went off to sleep in the night after a few pegs of Whiskey. Tossed and turned like like omlettee on a frying pan but all in vein; figured out I was not ready to sleep. Old memories kept on flashing inside my head. Memories have this bizzare' habit of visiting my head without a prior notice. But this time it was slightly different. I was not thinking about one person in perticular..Flashes from my childhood, from by graduation days affairs from my past affair and my wife kept haunting me. All the bad memories kept comming but I was not getting sad by any standards. I was haunted, teased and tricked within, but no sign of sadness... Now love has an uncanny way of fiddling with your thought process.. sometimes you feel sad thinking about all the good things that happened in love. Sometimes you smile on how someone you loved so dearly shattered you.. and like yesterday night, how all the bad things that your loved ones did to you leaves you with absolutely no feelings atall. Well, t...